Where the dangers presented by those with a little learning are allayed
Headlines, Banners, as Written by Morons, Idiots
This travesty has been introduced quite recently.
I imagine you've noticed it; it's where a moron or idiot who's in charge of writing a headline decides not to bother with a conjunction, but instead inserts a comma.
E.g. the title of this page should read "Headlines or Banners, as Written by Morons and Idiots".
These morons and idiots obviously can't read, or they'd notice that their "new way" of writing is unreadable – seriously unreadable; try reading it out loud to someone.
No-one speaks that way!
Be very clear on this: No-one would say "Headlines, Banners as Written by Morons, Idiots", so only a moron or an idiot would write it that way.
It doesn't even fall under the heading of ellipsis, because you're not allowed to ellipse any word that has a specific meaning that cannot be assumed from the context – e.g. if the space of the ellipsed word could be filled with "and" or "or", which have specific but different meanings, then you cannot ellipse it.
When reading such poor construction, you almost always have to read it more than once, because it simply does not fit into the way everyone speaks, the way everyone reads, or the way everyone listens.
What is even more annoying is that there is already a punctuation rule to cover this, if saving ink is the objective: "Headlines/Banners, as Written by Morons/Idiots".
If asked to read that out loud, you'll say "Headlines slash Banners, as Written by Morons slash Idiots", and the person listening will understand completely and immediately, just as you understood what you read completely and immediately.
If you wish to replace conjunctions with commas in this way, go right ahead – but be aware that it means that you're a moron or an idiot.
I've just been to this page, which has the headline:
Open Source Document Translator app translates PDFs, more, API made open source
That takes the stupidity to a whole new level. I mean, "PDFs, more, API made open source" is a list with three items, isn't it? That's the way it's written, and that's how everyone will read it.
Even if you realise that the moron/idiot dropped a co-ordinating conjunction, it still reads: "~~ app translates PDFs, more, and API made open source", because you'll instinctively imagine the conjunction after the last comma, making the co-ordinate clause look like the third item in a list.
If readers have to read such a simple sentence two or three times, before getting the (non)sense of it, the "writer" has done a piss-poor job.
FTR: It should read:
Open Source Document Translator app translates PDFs and more; API made open source
Yup, there are only two punctuation points in the moron's/idiot's headline, and both of them are wrong!
And he obviously hasn't got a clue about title case, either.
He would be so fired, if he worked for me.
Needless to say, I didn't bother to read the article, nor any other article on the site. There's no point in reading stuff that's written by morons/idiots, unless you're being paid to psychoanalyse them.
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