By Mark van Engeland

In the interests of decent syntax in pop music, I have translated this 'second language' song from Dutch-English into English-English. I think you'll agree that the result is far superior to the original.

 
The Road Ahead

Polder to Polder

The road ahead is block-paved
I want
Suspension on my bike
Why does the surface have such corrugation?
It's murder on the bum
Uneven as it is

Horizon, in the distance
Looks smooth
When it's so far away
You shouldn't be surprised that, when you get there
Your arse feels like it's flayed
At home, you should have stayed

{Chorus}
The road ahead will make your legs burn like a furnace
The road ahead will give you numbness in your feet
Numbness in your feet

Puddles from the rainfall
They hide
The dents and bumps and cracks
Your wheel-rims crunch on crevasses and canyons
Your spinal cord is fried

{Chorus}
The road ahead will make your legs burn like a furnace
The road ahead will give you numbness in your feet
The road ahead is as responsive as a tank-trap
And no-one will cure all your ills
Not even a surgeon
With years of creaking bones ahead of you

The road ahead is block-paved
I want
Suspension on my bike
Why does the surface have such corrugation?
It's murder on the bum
Uneven as it is

--o-O-o--
 

There.
I think that states, far more clearly, what the group intended to say.

 

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