Here it is, my take on what is possibly the best (and longest) horror novel of the last twenty years: Stephen King's IT. Now, for those of you who haven't read the book, I guess I'd better explain a couple of things. The book has two interweaving plots, a 'present day' plot set in 1985 and a 'flashback' plot set in 1958. Both plots featured the same characters and reached similar conclusions. When I had the inspiration for this story, I realised that if I subtracted 14 years from the Spice Girls' ages and set some parts of the story in 1985, then they'd be the perfect age for the 'flashback' plot. Hence, the 'flashback' plot of this story runs parallel to the 'present day' plot of the original book. Sound complicated? Don't worry, all will become clear.

Due to the length of this story, I'd suggest that you download it and read it later at your leisure, when you're not online. I'd be interested in feedback on what people think of longer stories. My E-mail address is at the bottom of the page.


vs. It

By Oliver Mulvey

(EXT: Maine Highway, 1999. The Spice bus shoots along the highway, under a leaden sky.)

(INT: Spice Bus. For once, Sporty is at the wheel. The other girls appear to be consulting their tour schedule.)

Posh: Where're we supposed to play next?

Scary: Some place called Derry. It looks like we'll be spending a few days there.

Ginger: What is it? Another shitty two-bit town?

Posh (pensive): Wait a minute. Did you say Derry? Damn. Why does that sound familiar?

Ginger: Maybe you've screwed somebody there before?

Posh: Screw you, bitch. That's not it.

Ginger: Of course not. After all, you don't have a kid called Derry, do you?

Posh: That's not funny.

Ginger (smirking): Yes it is.

Scary (trying not to laugh): Don't be so mean, Ginger. It's not Posh's fault that she... oh, I can't help it. Muhahahaha!

(Scary and Ginger roll on the floor laughing. Posh goes berserk and attacks them. Sporty hears the commotion and looks around.)

Sporty: Yee-ha. Another cat-fight.

(Abruptly, the fight stops.)

Posh: Goddamit, why do you have watch whenever we fight?

Ginger: Yeah, if you're watching us, then you can't be watching... (she falters)

Scary: Oh fuck...

Posh: The road!

(The other girls dash to the front of the bus.)

Posh (screaming): Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod, watch out for that car.

Ginger (panicked): Nooo! Not into the tree you stupid bitch!

Scary (terrified): This is it. We're going to die.

(The Spice bus swerves all over the road. Sporty somehow manages to bring it back under control before it can crash. Inside the bus, the girls take their places again.)

Sporty: Don't look at me like that. It wasn't my fault.

Posh: Yes it was.

Sporty: Damn, how did you know? (She points to a road sign marked 'Derry: 30 miles.') Look, we're almost there.

Posh: I'm sure I've been here before. I just can't remember it.

Scary: Hmm, I'm getting the same feeling.

Ginger: Yeah, me too. What about you, Baby?

Baby (nodding): Tee hee.

Sporty: Funny you should mention that...

Posh: This is weird. Do none of you remember anything?

Ginger: Nothing.

Scary: Nada.

Posh: Wait a minute. I remember that when I was eleven, we went to Bangor. My parents were on some business trip. Yeah, that's right. Then we moved on to Derry. (Posh begins to tell the girls her story.)

(EXT: The same stretch of highway, 1985. A limousine speeds towards Derry.)

(INT: Limousine. Young Posh sits in the back of the limo, with her parents.)

Young Posh: Daddy, why do we have to go to these horrible towns?

Posh's father: Your mother has some... ah... paying customers there.

Young Posh: But these places are always full of horrible poor people.

Posh's mother: But there are still enough people rich enough to afford my... erm... special services.

Posh's father: Actually, Victoria, I'd advise you to get used to this place. We'll be staying there for a while. We've heard that it's a weird, fucked-up town, so we figured that it would be the perfect place to bring you up.

(INT: Spice bus, 1999.)

Ginger: Hey, it seems like Derry had quite an influence on you.

Posh: Up yours, shitface. Actually, that's all I can remember at the moment. Maybe one of you could tell how you arrived. You might jog my memory.

Ginger: Hmm, I think I remember how I got here.

(EXT: Street on the outskirts of Derry, 1985. Young Ginger and her mother walk along the street, fighting their way through a torrential downpour.)

Young Ginger: Do you think we'll find Daddy here?

Ginger's mother: I've slept with quite a few men from here, so there's a good chance, although it'll take me a few weeks to track them all down. Besides, if he's not here, we can move on to Bangor. I've slept with dozens from there.

Young Ginger: I hope we find him. We could leech him for child-support.

(Suddenly, a limo roars past them. The limo drives through a puddle at the side of the road, splashing muddy water all over Young Ginger.)

Young Ginger: Hey, come back here, you assholes!

(As the limo shoots away, Young Ginger sees Young Posh's face at the young window. Young Posh gives her the finger.)

(INT: Spice bus, 1999.)

Scary: So is that why you two hate each other?

Ginger: I don't know. I didn't even remember that until a few minutes ago.

Scary: This is freaky. I think I'm remembering now.

(INT: A room in the Derry Town House hotel, 1985. Young Scary sits on one of the beds, crying and screaming while her parents unpack.)


Scary's mother: Calm down now, dear. This is for your own good.

Young Scary: How am I supposed to get my fix out here?

Scary's father: That's why we've brought you here. How many times have you been caught with those substances in school? A dozen? More?

Young Scary: It didn't hurt anybody.

Scary's father (exasperated): Thanks to you, the entire chemistry department is being investigated by the police.

Scary's Mother: We're hoping that you'll be able to break out of this if we remove you from your supply.

Young Scary: That's it! I've had it with you.

(Young Scary marches out the door, slamming it behind her.)

(INT: Spice bus, 1999. The bus passes a sign that reads 'Derry: 10 miles.' The town can be seen on the horizon.)

Sporty: Wait a minute. This place does look familiar.

(INT: Another room in the Derry Town House, 1985. Young Sporty and her mother are unpacking.)

Young Sporty: Why do we have to stay here?

Sporty's mother: Don't complain, darling. You know this is your father's big chance. You should be very proud of him. He's a sporting legend.

Young Sporty: I am proud. But why does he have to specialise in cross-dressing tiddlywinks?

Sporty's mother: Don't worry. I'm sure you'll make lots of new friends here.

Young Sporty: Oh good. I hope there are some nice boys.

(INT: Spice bus, 1999.)

Posh: Hold on, that's not right. We all know you're a dyke.

Sporty: That's a bloody lie.

Posh: Bollocks.

(The two girls try to stare each other down. Sporty looks away first.)

Sporty: Anyway. I did hope there would be some nice boys.

Posh: So what happened that changed you?

Sporty: I... don't remember that bit... yet.

Ginger: What about you, Baby. Do you remember Derry?

(INT: Crappy van, 1985. The van, which has obviously seen better days, lurches down the highway towards Derry. Baby's father sits behind the wheel. Baby and her mother dribble in the back seats.)

Baby's father: Duh... this... not... Liverpool... duh.

Baby's Mother: Tee Hee.

Young Baby: Duh.

Baby's father: Duh... me... think... we... is... lost...

Baby's Mother: Tee Hee.

Young Baby: Duh!

(INT: Spice bus, 1999. The bus enters Derry and pulls up in the parking lot at the town-house.)

Posh: Is this where we're supposed to stay?

Scary: Yeah. I remember this place. I stayed here.

Posh: I think I stayed at the horribly expensive place down the road.

Sporty: Why aren't we staying there? We could afford it.

Posh: Because our agents all hate us and want us to suffer.

Scary (looking around): You know, this place isn't exactly as I remember it.

Ginger: Yeah, downtown looks different. What happened to it?

Sporty: Dunno. Let's go check in.

(INT: Lobby, 1999. The girls enter.)

Sporty: Ah. I remember this place.

(INT: Lobby, 1985. Young Sporty steps out of an elevator into the lobby. As she does so, Young Scary runs out of a stairwell. Without noticing each other, the two girls head out into the parking lot, where they head off in different directions.)

(EXT: Derry street, 1985. Young Sporty wanders along the street, which is deserted. As she walks, a clown wanders out of a side street and gives an impromptu street-show.)

Clown: Hey, hey, hey, little missy. You new around here. I don't think I've seen you before. Let me introduce myself; I am Pennywise the clown. That's me. But enough about me. Who might you be?

Young Sporty (smiling nervously): I'm Melanie.

Pennywise: Well howdy then, Melanie. Now, I'd imagine that a pretty young thing like you would like to be meeting the local boys, no?

Young Sporty (more enthusiastic): Yeah!

Pennywise: Wonderful. I guess you'd better follow me. Oh, have a balloon. (He produces one from his sleeve and hands it to her.) They float, you know, they all float.

(As Young Sporty follows Pennywise into an alley, she fails to notice that the balloon floats quite happily into the wind.)

(EXT: Alley, 1985. Young Sporty and Pennywise walk down the alley.)

Young Sporty: Hey, how did you know I was new? There must be loads of kids in this town; you can't know them all.

Pennywise: Oh, I know all of the children in this town. Some of them float now.

Young Sporty (puzzled): Huh?

Pennywise: Oh yes, they float. And soon, you'll float too.

Young Sporty (having second thoughts): Hey, Mister, let's just go back to the main road.

Pennywise (turning to face her): We can't do that. You've got to FLOAT!

(As he turns, we see that his face is altered. His eyes are yellow and feral, his teeth are more pointed and his red lip-stick now looks like blood.)

Young Sporty: Eeeek!

(Young Sporty turns and dashes back towards the road. Pennywise chases her, snarling like an animal. Just as she reaches the road, he lunges at her. She braces for the impact, but it never comes. After a few seconds, she turns and looks back into the alley. It's now empty, apart from a solitary orange pom-pom, which lies on the ground next to a sewer grating.)

(INT: Hotel room, 1999. Curiosity has led the other girls to abandon common sense and go into a hotel room with Sporty. She finishes her tale.)

Scary (shocked): Wait a minute. You saw the clown as well?

Sporty: Why? Did you?

Scary: Yeah. But he wasn't like that at first.

(EXT: Derry Street, 1985. Young Scary has just left the parking lot. She's still angry from her confrontation with her parents. She wanders down the road towards a crossroads, where she looks around. The road becomes noticeably seedier in one direction. Guess which way she goes. She scans the sidewalks as she goes and then spots what she's looking for; a dodgy looking man stood on a corner. The man's face and clothing are concealed by a long overcoat.)

Young Scary: Hey, mister, are you in the business of... err... supplies?

Dodgy guy: Yeah. You buying?

Young Scary (immensely relieved): Oh yes.

(They edge into a side-street.)

Dodgy guy: You seem pretty desperate...

Young Scary: I just got the third degree about this off my parents. You know, 'these things are bad for you' and all that.

Dodgy Guy: They are bad for you. Look what they've done to me.

(The dodgy guy opens his overcoat. We see that his skin is scabbed and leprous. Pus oozes from a thousand blisters.)

Young Scary (backing away): Ah... maybe we'll... ah... do this some other time.

Dodgy/Leprous guy: But don't you want your lovely drugs? They'll make you high. They'll make you float. You'll float. We all float.

Young Scary: Aaargh!

(Accompanied by a weird optical effect, the Dodgy guy transforms into Pennywise.)

Pennywise: Come with me, Melanie. We'll all float.

(Young Scary dashes back onto the main road. When she's sure that she's not being chased, she turns and looks back into the side street, which is now empty.)

Young Scary: Wait a minute. How did he know my name?

(The voice of Pennywise drifts from a drain.)

Pennywise: Lucky guess?

(With a scream, Young Scary dashes back towards the hotel.)

(EXT: Parking lot, 1985. Young Scary and Young Sporty dash back into the parking lot, scared witless. They collide and notice each other for the first time.)

Young Sporty (breathless): Help... clown... chased...

Young Scary: What the hell?

Young Sporty: You too?

(INT: Hotel room, 1999. Posh stares at Scary in disbelief.)

Posh: Hey, that's impossible. You can't both have seen the clown at the same time.

Ginger: No, it's not. Don't you remember? We saw it too.

Posh: Huh? No we... wait... now I remember.

(EXT: Plush hotel exterior, 1985. This hotel is noticeably more up-market than the town house. Young Posh saunters out the main entrance. She fails to notice the drenched and mud-splattered Young Ginger who is hiding beside the entrance. Young Ginger lunges at her nemesis-to-be, sending her sprawling to the ground. Young Posh defends herself and the bloodbath, the first of many, begins.)

Young Ginger: Arrogant bitch.

Young Posh: Stupid slut.

(The two girls continue fighting, rolling around on the ground. They come to a stop at the feet of a clown. The clown is, of course, Pennywise.)

Pennywise: Hey, why are you two little ladies so mad? Cheer up! Your ol' pal Pennywise is here.

Young Ginger: So what, butt-fucker?

Young Posh: Yeah, up yours, asswipe.

Pennywise (taken aback): Hey, this isn't how it's supposed to go. (He remembers that the girls can hear him.) Aww, aren't you happy? Have a balloon. They float.

Young Posh: Bloody wonderful. Now piss off before I kick you in the bollocks.

Young Ginger: I know where you can stick your balloon...

Pennywise: Oh, fuck it. This isn't working. (His face distorts, taking on horrific aspects.) Prepare to die you little bitches.

Young Posh: Aaargh.!

Young Ginger: Run!

(The two girls dash towards the safety of the lobby.)

Young Posh: Hey, do you feel like heroically sacrificing yourself to save me?

Young Ginger: No.

Young Posh: Thought so, bitch.

(They narrowly escape Pennywise and reach the lobby.)

(INT: Hotel room, 1999.)

Posh: How the fuck did I forget something like that? I should have had nightmares for months.

Ginger: I'm not surprised you forgot it, since you're such a stupid bitch. However, I don't know why I forgot it.

Posh: Hey! You're going to pay for that.

(Before violence can break out, Scary changes the subject.)

Scary: Hey, Baby, did you see the clown?

Baby: Tee hee, duh.

(EXT: Derry street, 1985. Young Baby wanders along the street aimlessly, bumping into walls and lamp-posts. Suddenly, she stops. She sees a paperclip near a storm-drain entrance. The paperclip is caught in a small stream of water, the only evidence of the recent downpour. It heads towards the drain. Baby dives for it.)

Young Baby: Teeeeeee Heeeeeeeee!

(Young Baby arrives a moment too late. The paperclip enters the drain. She reaches her arm inside and feels around for it. Then, she sees a pair of large yellow eyes further back in the drain.)

Young Baby: Duh?

Voice from drain: Come on in, Emma, we all float.

(Intellectually, Baby's on about the same level as a gnat. However, even gnats have survival instincts. Baby picks herself up and runs for her life.)

(INT: Hotel room, 1999.)

Sporty: Shit, this is scary.

Scary: Do you think we could be in danger?

Ginger: I don't think so. This happened fifteen years ago.

Posh: As much as I hate to disagree with the demon bitch from hell, I have to admit that she's probably right. Anyway, we should try to get a good night's sleep. This will all seem a lot clearer in the morning.

(Posh, Ginger, Scary and Baby get up to leave.)

Sporty: Hey, where are you going?

Posh: Our rooms?

Sporty: Aww. Won't you stay here? I'm scared.

Ginger: Ha! I'm not falling for that one again.

(INT: Posh's room. It is the middle of the night and Posh is asleep. She is awakened by a hammering on her door. At first she ignores it, but it grows more insistant. She shouts out without bothering to get up.)

Posh: Fuck off, Sporty. You're not that scared.

(There is no reply. The hammering continues. Posh gets up and fishes a knife out of a drawer of cutlery.)

Posh: Grr... I'm going to chew that girl a new asshole. On second thoughts, I'd better not; she might enjoy it.

(Posh grips the knife menacingly and opens the door.)

Posh: What the hell?

(The doorway is empty. Posh looks down the corridor in both directions, but there is nobody to be seen. Then she looks at the ground. A dress lies on the floor by her feet. Attached is a tag saying "gift from your old friend, Pennywise")

Posh (horrified): Aiiii!

(The other girls rush out of their rooms and over to Posh.)

Scary: What is it? Are you ok?

Posh: I think so.

Ginger: Damn.

Scary: What's the matter?

Posh: Look! (She points at the dress.)

Scary (puzzled): It's a dress.

Sporty: Does it have some special significance?

Scary: Is it covered with blood that only you can see?

Posh: No, it's far worse. It's not a designer label.

Ginger: That's not important. What is important is that whatever It is, It's come back for us.

Posh: So we are in danger?

Scary: Why am I not surprised?

(INT: Sporty's hotel room, 1999. The other four girls have obviously decided that Sporty is less of a threat than It. They are crowded in the room, with everybody apart from Sporty lying fully clothed on the floor at a discreet distance from everybody else, avoiding each others' gazes. Sporty sits on her bed, grinning like a lunatic.)

Sporty: There, there, don't you feel better now.

Posh (muttering to herself through gritted teeth): Safety in numbers... I'll just keep telling myself that... safety in numbers.

Sporty: Don't worry. I'll protect you.

Ginger: Would you shut the hell up? I'm trying to sleep.

Sporty: Say, I know how you can get to sleep.

Scary: Let me guess. This would involve staying awake for a little while longer and using up all our energy doing strenuous things, wouldn't it?

Sporty: Well... yes.

Scary: Then fuck off.

(Sporty decides to change her plan of attack.)

Sporty: Hmm, I wonder how safe you are there on the floor?

Posh: What do you mean?

Sporty: Just think how easy it would be for something to sneak in and drag you away.

Posh: For God's sake, just shut up, Mel. There's no way on Earth that I'm getting into that bed with you.

(The lights go out. An unearthly howling comes from just outside the door. The room's small sink makes a loud gurgling sound, followed by a loud splat.)

Scary: This is it!

Ginger: We're going to die.

Pennywise (voice coming from drain): Come down here, girls. We all float down here.

(The lights come back on. We see the five girls all on the bed clutching each other. Four faces show horrified expressions. The other face seems caught between a scream of horror and a grin of delight. All five girls are covered with blood that has erupted from the drain.)

Posh (gibbering): Oh hell, oh shit, oh fuck.

Scary: Yeah, this is bad.

Posh: I know. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get bloodstains out?

Sporty: What the hell was that?

Ginger: I don't know. I can't remember. But, whatever it was, It seems to have gone now. I think It's had enough for tonight.

Posh: I'm not surprised; it's almost dawn.

Scary: Ok, let's get back on the floor. We still have time for a couple of hours sleep.

Sporty: Going so soon?

(Suddenly, the other girls notice that they're in close physical contact with Sporty, a fact which they obviously overlooked in their terror. There are a few more screams and thuds.)

(INT: Rose's Chinese Restaurant, 1999. The girls are eating lunch and discussing the events of last night.)

Scary: Ok, we're in above our heads here. Why don't we just get out of town?

Posh: We've got a concert here next week.

Scary: So? Screw the concert.

Posh: But concerts make us money. I'm sure you need the money.

Scary: Oh... you mean my... err... herb collection. Ok, we stay.

Sporty: If we want to survive until next week, we're going to need to remember what happened in 1985.

Posh: I think I remember how we all met up.

(EXT: Plush hotel parking lot, 1985. It is the day after the girls were first attacked by Pennywise. Young Posh exits the lobby of the hotel, perhaps slightly more cautiously than the day before. As she does so, she notices Young Ginger, who is waiting for her.)

Young Posh: Hey, are you following me, you stupid bitch?

Young Ginger: Ha! As if. Where are you going?

Young Posh: Somewhere.

Young Ginger: Really? That's where I'm going too.

(The two girls wander off in the same direction, trying to make it look like they're not together.)

Young Ginger: What the hell happened yesterday?

Young Posh (ignoring her): Huh? Did somebody speak?

Young Ginger: Give it up, I'm serious. What was that yesterday?

Young Posh: Just some sick weirdo. He was probably a poor person.

Young Ginger: You saw the way his face changed.

Young Posh: How do you expect me to know what it was? What did you think?

Young Ginger: I don't know. My brain's too small for me to have any thoughts.

(INT: Rose's Chinese Restaurant, 1999.)

Ginger: What the hell? I never said that.

Posh (smiling sweetly): Maybe not, but I'm telling this story.

Ginger: Bollocks to that.

(Ginger punches Posh in the teeth and takes up the story where Posh left off.)

(EXT: Derry street, 1985.)

Young Ginger: As I was saying, I think it must have been some kind of monster.

Young Posh: A monster? Are you insane?

Young Ginger: No, it could be... hey, wait a minute.

(She points to a discarded newspaper that lies on the sidewalk. The headline reads "Mystery Child-Killer claims fourth victim." Young Ginger picks up the paper and begins to read, slowly and haltingly.)

Young Ginger (reading): Panic is growing among Derry residents after the discovery of another child's body. Police have confirmed that the body the latest victim appears to have been mutilated in the same manner as the three bodies found earlier this year. When asked about possible links with the Adrian Mellon murder case, Police Chief Rademacher declined to comment. He dismissed out of hand suggestions that the murders were in any way linked to those of 1957/58. Police sources have revealed that several leads are being followed up and that the prevailing belief is that the murders are the work of more than one perpetrator.

(She finishes reading.)

Young Ginger: There's more, but it just seems to be political crap.

Young Posh: You think that clown's been murdering kids?

Young Ginger: There's something rotten in this town.

Young Posh: Yeah, you. You're completely nuts.

Young Ginger: I'm serious. This could be dangerous. That clown could be anywhere. He could even be... right... behind... us.

(She glances over her shoulder. On cue, Pennywise steps out of a side street. The two girls dash wildly through the street. Although they collide with several adult pedestrians, nobody notices them or their pursuer.)

(INT: Rose's Chinese restaurant, 1999.)

Scary (resigned): Yeah, I remember now. Something like that happened that happened to me and Sporty. We'd just left the hotel when It appeared behind us. We couldn't get back to the hotel, so we just ran, without knowing where we were going.

Posh: Same here. We ended up in that little valley that cut through town. What was it called? The wilds?

Scary: The barrens.

Posh: That's it.

(EXT: The barrens, 1985.)

(Despite their name, the barrens are actually lush and dense with vegetation. Posh and Ginger dash wildly through the undergrowth. Pennywise can be heard behind them. Eventually, the sound of his pursuit fades and disappears. The two girls come to a halt in a small clearing.)

Young Posh: I think we lost him.

Young Ginger: Problem is, I think we're lost too.

Young Posh: You stupid bitch. This is your fault.

(Before Young Ginger can reply, they are interrupted by Young Scary and Young Sporty, who dash in.)

Young Scary: Help! Something's after us.

Young Ginger: A monster clown?

Young Sporty: Hey, how did you know?

Young Ginger: Lucky guess?

(They are interrupted by the sound of something approaching fast. It is accompanied by a loud "Duuuuuuuuuu" noise. The girls prepare to take cover. Before they can do so, Young Baby dashes in and collides with the group. She sprawls onto the ground.)

Young Scary: Hey, are you alright?

Young Baby: Duh.

Young Scary: Can you say something?

Young Baby: Duh.

Young Posh: Is it human?

Young Ginger: The clown or the girl?

Young Posh: Both.

Young Ginger: The girls seems human, although I don't think she's a particularly good specimen. As for the clown; I don't know.

Young Sporty: Do you two know something about the clown?

Young Posh: Slut-bitch here thinks it's been killing children.

Young Sporty: It certainly tried to kill us.

Young Posh: Maybe we should stick together. There's safety in numbers.

(INT: Rose's Chinese restaurant, 1999. Posh finishes telling her story.)

Scary: Hang on, that can't be right. I remember the first time we all met; it was in London when that music company guy gave us a recording contract in return for having sex with him.

(INT: Record company executive's car, late 1995. The girls are lounging around in the car after earning their contract. If you want to read the events that led to this scene, read my Spiceworld story.)

Posh: Hey, do I recognise you girls from somewhere?

Scary: I don't think we've ever met before.

Ginger: It's funny that you should mention it, though, because I have an intense desire to punch you, even though I've never met you.

Scary: Maybe we did meet once.

(For a moment, it seems possible that the girls will remember everything. However, they are interrupted by the executive, who's ready for more action.)

Executive: Hey, if you girls want to go again I'll make sure you get some good studio singers. That way, you don't have to do any of the work.

Posh: Great. Let's go.

Sporty: Hey, mister, do you want to watch me go with one of the other girls?

(The executive grins lecherously, but, before this scene can get even further out of hand, the flashback ends and we return to the present.)

(INT: Rose's Chinese restaurant, 1999. The girls have finished their meal.)

Scary: Ok, let's go.

(Rose, the owner of the restaurant enters with a plate of fortune cookies.)

Rose: Perhaps you'd like to read your fortunes before you go.

(She hands each girl a fortune cookie. As they break them open, they don't find the usual cheesy message, but rather a spurt of blood, an unpleasant insect or some other such surprise.)

Ginger: Help! We're all going to die.

Rose: Nah. We just make them like that to give our customers a surprise.

(EXT: Derry street, 1999. The girls are discussing what to do.)

Sporty: This is impossible. We'll never survive a week here.

Posh: We might have a better chance if we could remember how we survived before. Does anybody remember anything else yet?

Ginger: Nothing. Something's blocking my mind.

Posh: What mind?

(For once, Ginger decides to ignore the jibe.)

Ginger: Maybe we should split up. Where did we go when we weren't together?

Scary: I can't even remember that.

Ginger: Just wander around. Maybe it'll come back to you. We'll meet up again at the hotel this evening.

(The girls split up and head off in different directions.)

(INT: Derry mall, 1999. Since Posh has changed very little since her childhood, it's simple enough for her to work out where she would have spent her time. She enters the mall and wanders around.)

Posh: God, I hate these little provincial dumps.

Pennywise (unseen): Hey, dumbass, that's my town you're talking about.

Posh (scared): Where are you?

Pennywise: Behind you!

(Posh spins around. Sure enough, Pennywise is right behind her.)

Pennywise: Gee, Kiddo, it's been a long time since we were here.

Posh: So I did see you here before?

Pennywise: Oh yeah, you don't remember, do you? Gee, isn't that too bad? Maybe this'll help.

(Pennywise snaps his fingers. Posh's face takes on a shocked expression as her memories come flooding back.)

(INT: Derry mall, 1985. Young Posh and her father stand in the centre of the main walkway.)

Young Posh: What's mother buying?

Posh's Father: Just some supplies for work.

Young Posh: Then why did she go into the shop with the chains and leather clothes in the window?

Posh's Father (uncomfortable): Err, those are the supplies she needs for her work. Why don't you go and look around on your own?

(INT: Clothing store, 1985. Young Posh wanders among the aisles, looking scornfully at the low price tags on most of the items. She turns around a corner and bumps headlong into a very familiar clown.)

Young Posh: Uh-oh.

Pennywise: Don't worry, Sticky Vicky, I'm not here to kill you today. I've got something much worse in mind.

Young Posh: Huh?

Pennywise: Now would be a good time for you start running.

(Pennywise flickers for a moment as he chooses a shape from Young Posh's mind. Suddenly, he takes the form of a tramp, a poor person, Young Posh's worst nightmare. Young Posh flees through the store. Pennywise cuts off some aisles and leaves others open, herding her towards some destination. She glances back over her shoulder and hurtles into a boy, who is roughly the same age as her. Pennywise vanishes. Young Posh and the boy pick themselves up.)

Young Posh: Are you Ok? Who are you?

Young Beckham: Duh... me... is... David... Beckham... me... want... shag... you...

Young Posh: Err, thanks, but I'd rather be torn apart by rabid dogs.

Young Beckham: Give... me... kiss...

(Young Posh takes to her heels and runs. Young Beckham's one track mind is locked on to her. He takes off in pursuit.)

(INT: Derry town house room, 1999. The girls enter separately, all seemingly furious.)

Scary: Damn. While I was out this afternoon, I remembered how that bastard Pennywise disguised Itself as a dealer and sold me some chalk that It swore was crack.

Sporty: I remembered how I was making out with a boy in that little park near the standpipe when a load of zombies came pouring out of the standpipe.

Baby: Duh! Duh! Tee Hee! Duh!

Ginger: I just remembered how It stole my bloody batteries.

Posh: I remembered something far worse. I remembered how I first met David.

Scary: What!?

Posh: Uck. It was hate at first site. How the hell did I end up marrying him?

Scary: We're dealing with a sick mind here.

Posh: Huh? Do you think Sporty is behind it then?

Sporty: Hey!

(INT: Hotel bedroom, later that night. It is now later that night. After the previous night, the girls are taking no chances and have dragged five beds into one room. Sporty is absent, being in the bathroom. Posh is talking on the phone. She hangs up and turns to the other girls.)

Posh: Oh no! David is on his way here. He's been thrown out of yet another tournament for attempting to murder another player. He needs somewhere to lie low until the fans stop baying for his blood.

Scary: I'd have thought you'd be pleased about that.

Posh: I've remembered how much I hate him. I can't even bring myself to look at him now.

Ginger (grinning): Goody. It should be fun when he gets here.

Posh: He's had some trouble getting tickets, so he won't be here for a couple of days. We need to wrap this business up before then.

Ginger: Why? Couldn't we just feed him to It when he gets here and hope that It's prepared to spare us in return?

Posh: I don't think so. There was something else about him... but I don't remember what yet.

(Sporty enters. She looks... well... different. Hey, if you've seen those recent photos, you know what I mean.)

Scary: Aiiieeee!

Posh: Oh my God.

Ginger: Mel, what's It done to you?

Sporty: Huh? Don't you like it?

Posh: What!? You mean you chose to look like that? But it's... it's... it's... (For once, Posh is lost for words.)

Scary: I think it's supposed to be blonde.

Posh: I think I'm gonna hurl. (Posh dashes into the bathroom and does so noisily.)

(INT: Hotel bedroom, the next morning. The girls are discussing their next move.)

Posh: So, we made it through the night. What do we do now?

Scary: If only we could remember how we survived before...

Ginger: I don't know if this helps, but I think I've remembered what happened next.

(EXT: Derry Street, 1985. The five girls are walking along a road that runs parallel to the barrens.)

Young Ginger: This is awful. Whenever I go anywhere, I feel like I'm being watched.

Young Scary: It feels like some evil force is staring at us.

Young Posh: Like some vile entity is always behind us.

(The girls turn around. Posh reacts with horror; what she sees is not Pennywise, but rather Young Beckham. Young Beckham seems to have found a friend; young Jimmy Gulzar.)

Young Posh: Oh God, it's that creep from the mall.

Young Scary: Run!

Young Sporty: Why? Don't you like boys?

Young Posh: Boys, uck!

Young Sporty: Weird.

(The girls take off into the barrens, their would-be lovers hot on their heels.)

Young Posh: This is useless. We'll never outrun them. We need somewhere to hide.

(Young Baby trips over an uneven patch of ground and falls. The others rush to her side. They notice that the ground that tripped her looks unusual.)

Young Sporty: Hey, I think this opens up.

(Sure enough, the area of ground is lifted, revealing a dark hole below. The girls climb down, closing the door after them.)

(INT: Underground club house, 1985. This is the same club house that the losers' club was forced to abandon in 1958.)

Young Ginger: They'll never find us down here.

Young Scary: Yeah, but what is this place?

Young Posh (straining to see in the dim light): Looks like some kind of club house. Hey, look at these magazines.

Young Scary: Why? Is Ginger's mother on the cover again?

Young Ginger: Hey!

Young Posh: No, they're comics. Wow, these are old. Look at the dates on them, 1958.

Young Scary: What's that smell?

Young Sporty: Smoke?

(Suddenly, Young Ginger goes blank. Well, blanker than usual.)

Young Posh: Hey, what's happened to slut bitch?

Young Scary: Hey, has she been at my stash?

Young Posh: Who cares? Let's kill her while she's defenceless.

Young Ginger (coming back to reality): Wow. I've just had some weird knowledge implanted in my mind by a strange, mysterious force. Apparently, we might be able to find out more about It through this old Indian smoke ceremony.

Young Scary: How do you know that the knowledge was implanted by a strange force?

Young Ginger: The only other place I could have found out about that ceremony was from a book.

All: Books, uck!

(INT: Club house, 1985. The girls sit around a pile of green wood that has been set up in the centre of the floor. Young Scary lights a match and throws it onto the wood. Smoke billows up and begins to fill the club house.)

Young Posh: So, what's supposed to happen?

Young Ginger: Just get out when you can't stand the smoke any more. Apparently, the last two people here will have a vision.

(The girls sit in silence for a few minutes. Then Young Posh gets to her feet and starts to scramble out.)

Young Posh: Argh! I can't take it any more.

Young Sporty: The smoke?

Young Posh: No! The thought of what this smoke is doing to my clothes.

(Young Posh exits. The other girls sit still for a few more minutes. Then Young Baby is on her feet and scrambling out. Young Ginger follows.)

Young Sporty: This isn't working. We're just going to choke to death in here.

Young Scary: Hmm...

(Young Scary searches her pockets and tosses a small item onto the fire. The texture of the smoke changes subtly.)

Young Sporty: Hang on. Something's definitely happening. I feel really weird; I think the vision must be coming on.

(As she speaks, the walls of the club house expand around her. The area grows larger and larger until the walls cannot be seen any more. The smoke billows in close around the girls. Suddenly it clears; Young Scary and Young Sporty find themselves sitting on the roof of the Derry amphitheatre. Although they have no way of knowing this, they are watching the concert that they will be scheduled to perform fourteen years later. They watch without recognising as their future selves walk on stage and start singing.)

Young Sporty: Ugh, what the hell is that noise? Music?

Young Scary: It sounds like the kind of catchy but nauseating rubbish that people sell to get famous.

Young Sporty: It's hideous.

(Suddenly, the smoke closes in again. When it clears, the two girls are stood on the ground in the same area. However, there are no buildings, roads or cars, just trees.)

Young Scary: What the hell?

Young Sporty: This is Derry. A long time ago.

Young Scary: What can I hear now?

(A loud whining sound fills the air. The girls turn their gazes upwards and watch a flaming object as it falls to the ground.)

Young Scary: What is it? A meteor?

Young Sporty: No, It's alive. Can't you feel it?

Young Scary: It's angry, isn't it?

Young Sporty: It's come here to stop something.

Young Scary: What?

Young Sporty (hysterical): Don't you understand? It's come here to stop that music.

(The smoke closes in again. This time it does not go away. The two girls start to cough and splutter.)

(INT: Hotel room, 1999.)

Sporty: Then you got worried and dragged us out?

Ginger: Worried? Hardly. We just got bored.

Posh: If this is true, then things are worse than we thought. It exists for the sole purpose of killing us. The other victims were just necessary to keep Its hunger at bay.

Scary: It's not going to let us go easily.

(EXT: Derry hotel room, 1999. Later the same day. Sporty goes over to the room's fridge to get herself a drink. As she opens the fridge door, balloons float out. Each balloon bears a message on the side.)

(Wannabe... torn limb from limb?)

(Say You'll Be There... because I'll be waiting for you with a chainsaw.)

(Two Become One... well, five become none.)

(Mama... surely you've not got banged up again?)

(Who Do You Think You Are... I think you're as good as dead.)

(Spice Up Your Life... while it lasts.)

(Too Much... pain in store for you.)

(Stop... or I'll kill you.)

(Viva Forever... well, for the next for few hours at least.)

(Goodbye... damn right.)

Ginger: This is hopeless. Unless we remember more, we're going to die.

Posh (excited): Wait! I remember more. That old house. Remember? We fought It there.

(EXT: Neibolt Street, 1985. Neibolt street is possibly the most desolate area of Derry; all the houses are long abandoned, their windows broken and boarded up. The girls walk along the street.)

Young Posh: Are you sure that going on the attack is a good idea?

Young Scary: If we don't kill It, we'll have to keep running from It? Sooner or later, we won't be able to get away.

Young Ginger: We won't be staying here forever. Maybe we could just avoid It until we go home.

Young Sporty: How do you even know we'll find It here?

Young Scary: Look at this place; can't you feel that It's been here?

Young Posh: All I can feel is that I want to get out of here.

Young Scary (hesitating): Yeah, maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. Let's head back.

(The girls turn around, but find the street behind them blocked by Young Beckham. When they turn around again, they find that the street is blocked in the other direction by Young Jimmy.)

Young Scary: Quick, let's cut through one of these houses.

(The girls dart through the gate of one of the houses, number twenty nine. They find the front door locked, but enter the basement through a broken vent.)

(INT: Number 29 Neibolt Street cellar, 1985. The girls climb down a large coal heap and wait for their eyes to adjust to the dark.)

Young Scary: Oh damn, why did we have to choose this house?

Young Posh: Even I can feel It now. It's very close.

(The girls grope their way out of the cellar, avoiding rats and spiders as they go. They emerge into the kitchen. The back door lies just across the room, while a door behind them leads to the hall and the stairs to the upper floor.)

Young Ginger: There's the back door. Let's get out of here.

(The girls walk towards the back door. However, they somehow find themselves standing at the door to the hall.)

Young Ginger: What the hell?

Young Posh: Great navigation, bitch. Let me try.

(Young Posh starts to lead the group to the back door. Again, they find themselves standing before the door to the hall.)

Young Posh: I guess we're supposed to go this way.

(The girls head down the hall towards the stairs. As they go, the walls and ceiling distort and waver around them.)

Young Scary: Strange, I don't remember taking anything this morning.

(Trying their best to ignore the eye-wrenching display that the house is putting on, the girls climb the stairs. At the top, they find all the doors locked, apart from the one leading to the bathroom. They enter.)

(INT: Number 29 Neibolt Street bathroom, 1985. The room is exactly as it was in 1958, with shards of the broken toilet scattered around the room. A few faded bloodstains bear witness to the Losers' Club's earlier fight there.)

Young Posh: Hey, Geri, have you been using that toilet?

Young Scary: Quiet! I think something's coming.

(A roaring sound is heard coming from the drains. Suddenly, It bursts out. For a moment, it assumes no shape. Then, it morphs between a number of different shapes: a werewolf, a mummy, a leper, a giant bird, a huge eye, a blue-skinned zombie, a massive cockroach, an acid-blooded alien, an insane clown. The creature tests out shapes taken from nightmares, from myths, from films. Finally, it settles upon a more unconventional shape; that of Young Ginger.)

Pennywise/Young Ginger: Hmm, how does it feel to know you're about to kill yourself, Geri?

Young Posh: Die, you bastard.

Pennywise/Young Ginger (realising It may have made a mistake): What the...?

(Before It can say more, Young Posh attacks it with a savage flurry of blows. It recoils, wounded not so much by the strength of the attack as by the fury of the attacker. It retreats back into the drain.)

Young Ginger: How the hell did you do that?

Young Posh: You've no idea how much I've been wanting to plant my knuckles in that face, bitch.

Young Sporty: Hey, have we won? Did we kill It?

Young Scary: I don't think so. It got away.

(INT: Hotel bedroom, 1999. Posh finishes her story.)

Ginger: You know, I'm really going to have to kick the shit out of you once this is over.

Posh (sarcastic): Oooh, I'm so scared.

Scary: Knock it off. So, what happened next? Did we hurt It enough there that it couldn't come after us again before we came home?

Posh: I don't think so. After we fought it, things were... well... different. I can't quite remember how.

Scary: We can think about that in the morning. I need some sleep now.

(Sporty looks hopeful.)

Scary: Believe me, you didn't have a chance even before you dyed your hair.

(INT: Hotel bedroom, 1999. Later the same night. The girls are sleeping. There is a loud knock at the door. The girls get up and cautiously edge towards the door. They stand around it holding knives and other weapons. Posh edges forward, swings the door open and then darts back. Beckham stands at the door.)

Ginger: What the hell? I thought he wasn't due for a few days.

Posh: Uh-oh. David... look... there's something I have to tell you...

(Beckham makes no reply. Instead, he steps slowly into the room. His eyes display not their usual amiable brain-dead look, but rather a kind of ferocious insanity. He draws a knife from his trousers.)

Posh: Watch out! Something's happened to him.

Scary: What? Is he possessed by It?

Posh: Maybe. (Suddenly, realisation dawns.) No! He's not possessed. He's been helping It all along. Don't you understand?

(Beckham lunges at the girls with his knife. The blade misses Posh by inches and a general melee ensues. The girls swing at Beckham with their weapons. Ginger and Posh take surreptitious swipes at each other. Finally, the wounded David turns and flees.)

Sporty: What the hell happened to him? He's always been thick, but never dangerous.

Posh: Don't you remember? This happened before. After we beat It in that old house, everybody turned against us. It turned them loose on us.

(INT: Derry Town House lobby, 1985. It is late evening. Young Scary and Young Sporty are hanging around. A tall, bald man, who speaks with a stutter, is checking in.)

Young Sporty: This is nearly over now. I think it's going to end tomorrow.

Young Scary: How do you know that?

Young Sporty (pointing at the tall man): I can tell. He knows about It. He's come here to fight It.

(The tall man finishes his business at the desk and exits the lobby. Suddenly the receptionist becomes hysterical and begins yelling at the two girls.)

Receptionist (yelling): Get out of here! Clear off! I know what you're up to! You'll never do it!

Young Sporty: Quick. Let's get to our rooms.

(They head for the elevators, but the receptionist bars their way.)

Receptionist: I told you to get out of here. Now do it, or else I'll kill you.

(They run out of the lobby.)

(EXT: Clearing in the barrens, 1985. Midnight. Young Scary and Young Sporty dash into the clearing. The other girls are already present.)

Young Posh: You too?

Young Sporty: Yeah. What's happening? Everybody wants to kill us.

Young Posh: It's turned them against us. We need to kill It.

Young Sporty: But where is It?

Young Posh: I don't know. Let's spend the night here. We can find It in the morning. I don't feel like taking It on in the dark.

(EXT: Clearing in the barrens, 1985. Early morning. The dawn can just be seen on the horizon. The girls are disturbed by a loud, distant shout.)

Young Beckham: VICTORIA!!!

Young Jimmy: MELANIE!!!

Young Posh: We need to get out of here.

Young Sporty: Why? They probably just want to make out with us.

Young Posh: Maybe that was true before. Now, they probably just want to kill us.

(The girls dash off through the barrens. Suddenly the come into another clearing and are met by a strange sight. A group of five adults are climbing down into a sewer pipe. Among them is the bald man who was in the Town House earlier.)

Young Sporty: Hey! That bald guy is here to fight It. They must know where It lives. It must be in the sewers.

(The girls wait for the adults to climb down, then follow at a discreet distance.)

(INT: Hotel bedroom, 1999.)

Scary (excited): That's it! The sewers. Come on, we need to go there now, before anybody else comes for us.

Posh: Wait a minute. There's something else I need to know first.

Scary: What?

Posh: What's the fashionable thing to be seen wearing in a sewer?

Sporty: Who cares?

Posh: When we meet It, I don't want to create the wrong impression.

Ginger: What do you mean, you silly cow? We're going to rip its head off, not take it to dinner.

Posh (haughty): It costs nothing to dress well.

Ginger: Yes it does; I've seen the prices on those designer labels you wear.

Posh: So what? We're rich.

Ginger: Oh yeah.

(INT: Sewer, 1999. The girls enter the sewer through a ladder leading down from the ceiling. They enter a cramped pipe. The pipe branches just ahead.)

Scary: Where do we go now?

Ginger: Does anybody remember which route we took last time?

(INT: Sewer, 1985. The girls follow the losers' club, staying far enough back that they are not detected. They crawl through sewage pipes and sluice gates. They watch, puzzled, as the bald man struggles with a zombie-child. The losers' club hurries ahead and passes through a strange door. The girls head towards the door, but, before they can reach it, they are intercepted by one of It's manifestations. For a moment, the manifestation is shapeless, then it decides on the form of Young Beckham.)

Young Scary, Young Posh, Young Ginger and Young Baby: Aaaiiieee!!!

(They flee into the shadows.)

Young Sporty: I don't see what you're so afraid of. It's only a boy.

(Suddenly, Young Beckham's skin is covered by sores. His face splits open and his skin oozes foul liquids. He drops his trousers and grins at Sporty with what remains of his mouth.)

(Young Sporty vomits copiously, then the phantom crumbles into dust.)

Young Sporty: Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.

Young Scary: Are you all right?

Young Sporty: I don't ever want to touch another male again.

Young Scary: Wow, that must really have shocked you.

Young Sporty: Just hold me.

Young Scary: Hmm, why don't I trust you any more?

(The girls proceed to the door and enter it.)

(INT: Sewer, 1999.)

Posh: Hah! So that's why Sporty is a dyke?

Sporty: I'm not. Honest.

Posh: Bullshit. You said that you never wanted to touch another man again. It's true.

Sporty (moaning): But I didn't mean it.

Posh: Whatever.

(The girls make their way through the sewers, following the same route that they did in 1985. This time, they reach the door without incident.)

Scary: This is it. When we go through that door, we either kill It or die.

Ginger (having second thoughts): Actually, I think I'll be off now. I've been meaning to start a solo career.

Posh (threatening): Just try it.

Ginger: But it'd be really good. I'm sure that all my singles and albums would go straight in at number one.

Posh: Fat chance.

Ginger: Oh, ok then. I don't suppose anybody remembers what happened through there?

(INT: It's lair, 1985. The lair resembes a huge spider's web. It, which resembles a giant spider, sits in the centre of the web. The girls enter the lair and hide behind a clump of web. They watch as the events from the end of the novel unfold. Bill, the bald man, challenges It. It is on the point of defeating him when Richie joins in the fight. He in turn is saved by Eddie, who is killed in the process. Badly wounded, It turns and flees deeper into Its lair. Bill and Richie pursue it.)

Young Sporty: They're going to kill it.

(Suddenly, events take a different turn to those described in the book. It emits a high pitched squeal. The losers' club fall to the floor, clutching at their heads. They quickly lose consciousness. The Spice Girls are somehow unaffected.)

Young Posh: Hey, why didn't that knock us out?

Young Scary: Maybe we're immune to really unpleasant noises.

Young Posh: Maybe. But that doesn't matter. Let's kill It while It's weakened.

(INT: It's lair, 1999. The girls enter and It charges down Its web towards them.)

It: We meet again. You may have beaten me last time, but this time, you're all going to die.

Posh: Did you hear that? It said we beat It. If only we could remember how.

(INT: It's lair, 1985. The girls close on It. Suddenly, It spins around to face them.)

It: So, we meet at last. I had hoped to be stronger when I faced you, but these (It gestures at the loosers) were stronger than I had expected. I think I'll let them live; after all, they were amusing. Of course, I'll have to alter their memories so that they remember killing me. (It gestures with a leg; the loosers glow for a second and then lie still again.) It makes little difference, because as soon as I've killed you, I can leave this world. Even though I am weakened, you will be unable to withstand my attack.

(The girls start dodging as It flails at them with Its wounded limbs. Suddenly Ginger goes blank.)

Young Posh: What a surprise 96 slut-bitch blanks out again. Hey, Mr. Spider, kill her.

(Before It can respond, Ginger comes back to reality.)

Young Ginger: Hey, apparently It can't kill us, because we've got girl power, whatever that is.

It: Girl Power? What the hell kind of dumb-ass marketing trick is that?

Young Scary: It's catchy, isn't it?


It: Ack, I can't take it. Shut up! Shut up! I can't think with this racket. Oh, I give in, you win this one. But I'll warn you, we will meet again.

(It scuttles into a hole in the corner of Its lair.)

It: Oh, I almost forgot, I'd better take your memories, for safekeeping.

(The girls glow as their memories of the events of the last few months start to fade.)

Young Posh: We need to get out of here before we forget where we are.

(The girls, along with the losers' club, who are coming around, exit Its lair. Outside, the sewers are flooded. During the girls' time in the sewers, a flash flood has demolished much of the town, sinking sections into the sewers. The girls clamber up a collapsed section of road and emerge into downtown. They look at each other, as if to speak, then realise that they don't even know each others names. They shrug and walk off in different directions.)

(INT: It's lair, 1999.)

Posh : Was that it ? We just forgot what had happened and went our separate ways?

Scary: Looks like it.

Posh: That's amazing.

It (feeling rather left out): Excuse me!

Posh: Oh, shut up. This is interesting.

It: I've been waiting a long time for this. Why don't we just get it over with.

Posh: All right. Ready, girls?

The Girls: Girl Power! Girl Power! Girl Power! Girl Power!

(It recoils. Wounds appear on Its body.)

It: No! Not again!


It: No! It can't end like this; not after so many years.

Elderly voice: I bet you thought you'd seen the last of us.

(The surviving members of the losers' club step out of the shadows at the back of the room. They're now a bit... well... elderly.)

Elderly Bill: We had to come back and watch.

Elderly Mike (rather hard of hearing): What?

It: Help me!

Elderly Mike: Speak up!

Elderly Bill: Why the hell should we help you, after all you put us through?

It: Don't you understand? I'm only here to kill them. The other murders were just practice and feeding. In a few hours time, these sluts are due to play a concert here. Now, I only ever killed a few kids; these bitches have brainwashed them. They'll con them into buying cheesy merchandising and cheesier records.

Elderly Bill (uncertain): You killed my brother...

It: If he'd lived, they'd have sold him records. What's worse; death or a Spice Girls record?

Elderly Bill: You're right. Let's kill them.

(The losers' club descends upon the Spice Girls. The girls find themselves dodging blows from walking sticks and zimmer-frames. Their chanting stops. As soon as it does so, It charges forwards. It goes to each of the girls in turn and bites their heads off.)

It: At last, my task is complete. I may depart.

Elderly Bill: Hey, you're not that bad after all.

It: And you're not bad, for a human.

Elderly Bill: Say, why don't we go have a few beers before you leave?

It: Sounds great.


So, you made it this far did you?

I'm particularly interested in knowing what you think of the longer format. It this something you'd like to see in the future? Now, I realise that there are probably quite a few inconsistencies between my story and the book, but please try to understand that this was a really mammoth task and I didn't have time to double check every reference.

IT is copyright of Stephen King. Spice Girls Die Violent Deaths is copyright of Cloud Volpe. The Spice Girls vs. IT is copyright of Oliver Mulvey. Please do not reproduce without the consent of the author.

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