The SGDVD series

 At Last !  An enemy worthy of our talents !   vs.    ...

The Story So Far:
Our hero (with the aid of his sidekick Gums, the Fruity Wonder) managed to contrive a scheme whereby the Spice Girls – especially Mel Heebiegeebie, who had spurned him so cruelly – would be consumed in a blazing fireball in a toy store.
Whether his plan has succeded or failed is still unknown; but five of the ten people who were inside the store have not yet emerged, so it is possible that the four Spice Girls are among the missing.
But it is also possible that some of them may have survived!
Far worse, from the point of view of our hero, is that his faithful sidekick, Gums, gave his life in the implementation of the plan.
Nevermore would they swing side-by-side through the city on their nightly patrols.  Nevermore would they train together in the StringCave, nor ride out to combat evil in the StringMobile...
... But our hero did not have time to mourn.
He needed to find out if any of the Spice monsters had survived, and, if they had, take action to ensure that they would not be on the Earth for much longer.
His epic saga continues....

Thread 9

The dust was so thick that it was impossible to identify the five figures who had emerged from the ruins of the toy store.
One of them seemed to be offering succour to one of the others.
"I've Told you!"  screamed the one who was in receipt of that aid.  "If you try and touch me with those bleeding hands again, I shall rip 'em off and stuff 'em up your arse!"
"Hey, forget her!"  said a third figure.  "My boobs have gone all crooked again.  How'd you like to help me straighten them?"
"Shit, man,"  said a fourth.  "Your boobie is was gon around the backsies!  How is you did dun that?"
"Wow!"  said the fifth.  "It's a Miracle!  Look!  I came through all that without even creasing my dress!"
A bicycle suddenly barrelled out of control through the crowd and crashed into a section of still-standing wall.
The near-destroyed wall wobbled, and a lone brick fell from the top.
The brick fell directly onto the head of the fifth figure, who instantly collapsed to the floor.
"EMMA!"  shrieked Melanie.  "Are you all right?"
"Tee hee!"  replied Emma, getting back up.  "Duh!"
"Um, sorry,"  said the cyclist.  "My wheel locked up..."
"'Sallright,"  Mel told him.  "No harm done."
"Tee hee!"  said Emma.
The cyclist picked up his bike and inspected it.  A piece of string had become somehow entwined in the wheel.  He untangled it and flung it aside, then struggled off with his mangled transport.
The five survivors staggered out of the rubble, in the direction that took them away from the crowd of onlookers.
"We're in the shit now, you know!"  Melanie said grimly, as they reached the street.  "We're supposed to be doing a song at the party, tonight.  They'll be well pissed off that there are only three of us.  They might even ask for their money back!"
"Eh?"  A terrified expression crossed Mel's face.  "Ask for the money back!!!  They can't do that, can they?  What should we do, Em?"
"Duh,"  Emma replied.
"Yeah, Em,"  agreed Melanie.  "That's what I thought, too.  We'll have to find a substitute"
Mel turned back to the others.  She looked suddenly sad.
"It's just hit me..."  she said.  "... Victoria's Dead!"
"Tee Hee!"  said Emma.
"Yeah,"  agreed Melanie, smiling.  "'Tis a bit of a giggle, isn't it?  I never liked the posey cow, either."
"Duh!"  said Emma.
"S'pose you're right,"  said Mel.  "She was a bit of a tart; and besides, it means that we only have to split the money three ways, now."
"Well, we'd better find a fourth Spice Girl for the show tonight!"  Melanie pointed out.  "That's what they've paid for, and they're gonna expect their money's worth!  How about if we..."
Her voice trailed off as a huge, flashy limousine pulled up in front of them.
The window rolled down.
"Did you just come from that explosion?"  came a husky female voice from within.  "Do you need any hel—"
Geri's head popped out through the window.
She suddenly recognised three of the five survivors.
"Oh,"  she said.  "It's you."
The window closed, and the car sped off.
"FAT BITCH!"  Mel yelled after it, shaking her fist.
"Leave it, Mel!"  Melanie tried to placate the irate lunatic.  "She ain't worth it."
"Well, let's get back to the hotel,"  growled Mel.  "And I'll come up with a Plan!"
"Duh!"  Emma whispered to Melanie.
"Yeah,"  agreed Melanie.  "Completely fucked, if we let her do the planning!"

Thread 10

Nothing interesting was happening at the site of the explosion, any more, so the crowd slowly drifted off to gather around a talking stain in the road.
No-one noticed when a small area of rubble started to move...
A too-manicured hand found its way through the debris, followed by an arm, then a whole body.
"H... Help me..."  whimpered Victoria.
She was not badly injured – she had been protected from the effects of the blast by the pool table she had been laid out under -- but her dress had been stretched to twice its original length as she had dragged herself from the wreckage, and she had broken a nail!
The thought of wearing clothes that had been battered into a state which made them almost presentable was too much for her.  She felt faint, weak, and sick to her stomach.
She was struggling through the rubble, swearing like a trooper at what it was doing to her shoes, when her foot became entangled in a piece of string.
She tripped, falling forward onto a broken and twisted metal shelving rack.
The upright pole of the rack struck her throat, its sharp edge breaking the skin and passing straight through to come out the other side of her neck.
"Thank God!"  she thought.  "It only hit my larynx.  At least it's nothing I make good use of!"
She pulled herself back to her feet, a four foot steel pole sticking through her neck, like the Frankenstien monster with an erection.
The metal pole brushed against an exposed high tension wire, and four thousand volts shot through her body, like a bolt from the blue – presumably sent at the muses' behest.
Her blackened, fried body collapsed to the floor.

The poor, hungry mutt smelled Meat!
She swiftly located the still sizzling Spice Girl, and ate the best meal she had had in months!

Thread 11

"Well it's about time you came out of there!"  Mel snapped, as Britney emerged from the bedroom.  "Where's Melanie?"
"Oh,"  Britney giggled.  "She's a bit tired, so she's having a nap, when she's finished her cigarette."
"Oh, well that's just bloody marvellous, isn't it?"  Mel barked.  "We're supposed to be finding our way out of getting into trouble with the party organisers, and she's having a bleeding nap!"
"Tee Hee!"  said Emma.
"What's that supposed to mean?"  Mel rounded on her.  "Since when did you get to be such a smartarse?"
"Are my boobs straight?"  asked Britney, feeling her chest.  "I think I've lost one of them."
"Shit, man!"  said the Braindead One.  "How is does your boobsies getting down to your kneesies?"
"My knee?"  repeated Britney.  "Oh, that's where it went!  Thanks."
"Look, we're trying to have a meeting, here!"  Mel snapped.  "Either join in with something useful, or fuck off!"
"Hey!"  Britney snapped back.  "I didn't ask to come here, you know!  I've got no problems!  I can go on and sing my song without any help from you!  If you want my help, you better be nice to me!"
"Duh!"  agreed Emma.
"Shit man, I is sorry!"  The Braindead One started to cry.
"Awww, not you, Sugar,"  Britney told him.  "I mean the mouthy bitch, over there!"
"Tee Hee!"  said Emma.
"Eh?"  shouted Mel.  "Well that's just fookin' charmin', isn't it!  And I suppose you all think you can sort your way out of this without me, too, do ya?"
"Duh!"  said Emma.
"Shit, man,"  said the Braindead One.
"Is that straight?"  asked Britney, moving silicon.
Mel looked ready to explode.
"Well, Balls to the bloody lot of ya, then!"  she screamed.  "You lot can do it on your own!  I'm going to take a bath!  You can let me know what we're doing when I'm finished!"
"Tee Hee!"  said Emma.
"I know it's not my bleeding birthday!"  Mel growled in reply.  "I'm having a bleeding bath anyway!"
She stormed from the room.
Everything went quiet.
"Um...,"  said Britney.
"Shit, man,"  said the Braindead One.
"Tee Hee!"  said Emma.

The Meeting of the Minds has arrived!!!
What decisions will they reach?
Will the world discover that four have become three, and that Five have become One?
Does anyone care?


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